Daveed Reviews

Consumer Product Review: Cuisinart Coffee Maker

As I lay in bed this morning, trying to gently wake up Rudy by tooting Revelry through the whistler in my nose created by the chunk of dried snot, my outlook would have been less fun and games had I known the fun and games in store for me over the next few minutes. Eventually, the whistler stopped whistling, so I hustled out of bed before I got accused of blowing a corn flake on Rudy’s side of the bed.

My AM routine is pretty routine: get up, take a dose of anti-crazy pills, go to the kitchen and feed the cat, then get on with making myself as pretty as I can, which is a stretch on most days. This morning, however, was a little different.

I shuffled my way through the kitchen where the cat is always waiting for me to feed her. I usually bend over and scratch my pussy for a few minutes, then fill her bowl up with the Overweight-Cat Purina Formula. This morning, I flicked on the light switch and I noticed the huge, brown mass on the counter top in the general area of the coffee maker. Once again, a few grounds had become clogged in the brew basket and the grounds and the hot water had overflowed onto the counter. DAMMIT! So, after entertaining myself with my whistler for the first 5 minutes of the day, I spent the next 10 cleaning up after the Cuisinart.

This is not the first time this has happened, and I’m sure it’s not the last. In fact, it used to happen so frequently that we used to put the coffee maker in the sink at night, just in case.

Further irritating me about this $150 coffee maker is that, once the brew cycle has finished, it beeps to let you know. Not once, not twice, not even 3 or 4 times, but 5 times. And it’s not a gentle, soothing “hey, just wanted to let you all know that your coffee’s ready when you are”, but a brash, squawky “COME AND GET IT!!!!!!!!”

So ixnay on the Cuisinart coffee maker. Think I may fork out the G note for the Saeco.

posted by daveed @ 22.2.06