Daveed Reviews

Happy Birthday, mom

75 years ago on April 8 my mom was born.

Somehow, it became tradition in the last 9 years or so that we would take her to dinner at the Outback Steakhouse. She would get the 7 oz Victoria’s Fillet, medium, the house salad with vinegar and oil (plus my discarded tomatoes), and a jacket potato with no sour cream. For desert, a Chocolate Thunder from Down Under was split. Being a germ-phobe, she was always very careful not to let her spoon touch a portion of the desert that someone else’s spoon may have come in contact with. All of that would be washed down with a 12 oz. Glass of Foster’s; 2 if she was feeling daring.

For 2 years now, my brother’s family and mine have gone to the Outback on the 8th day of April. She may not be at the table with us, but she is in our hearts and minds.

I’d like to take this opportunity to say FUCK YOU to Wesley Lohman, the man who is leaglly blind in his left eye but still felt like it was a good idea to take his good eye of the road to put his insurance card away in his sun visor.

Also, FUCK YOU to the grand jury that did not feel his behavior constituted a “gross deviation from ordinary care”.

Yes, FUCK YOU to the committee that heard the testimony of 3 people that have lost family members in the last few years as a result of being hit from behind by a motor vehicle while riding their bicycle on the road. This committee felt the testimony not compelling and gave us the Heisman regarding Senate Bill 859, also known as the Safe Passing Bill.

Finally, a huge FUCK YOU to God, because You are doing a shitty job. I used to not believe in you, but now I desperately hope you exist, because I want to blame you for all the shit you have fucked up. Thanks for all you’re doing for us: Nazi Germany; Viet Nam; Rowanda, 9-11; Iraq and the Tsunami, just to name a few.

Oh, yeah: where were you on May 8, 2004?

posted by daveed @ 9.4.06